It has been a busy couple of months, and in the retail world, it's only the beginning! In addition to preparing for the holiday season (can't believe it's already November), I've been going through a lot of change both personally and professionally. I've been feeling pretty good about it. I've finally found a small group that I love and people that I'm starting to connect with. I am enjoying my work, and doing some pretty cool things with the company. I've felt pretty good about myself. (As if I've had anything to do with the success I've recently experienced!)
I have been going through the interview process at work in order to eventually get promoted to another HR position. You have to go through quite a few rounds of interviews! Through a series of circumstances, God really brought me to my knees. While I passed my first round of interviews, the second round got moved from November to February. God needed to remind me that He is in control, not me. That his plan is perfect, not mine. Not a fun lesson to be reminded of. I spent a couple of emotional days not understanding why the perfect timing I had planned out in my head wasn't working out. I cried a lot of tears and placed a lot of blame. In my typical dramatic way, I saw it as the end of the world.
It's only been a couple of weeks since my interviews and I have already seen so many blessings from it. God certainly works in mysterious yet awesome ways. I have also started to dig deep in the mess of my heart and work through my sinful tendency to make my own plans and dream up my own life purpose. I came across a challenging verse in Isaiah and as I was reading it, I really felt God saying that this needs to define me. Am I willing to change where my eyes are focused?
"You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in You, all whose thoughts are fixed on you."
Isaiah 26:3
My gaze had been inward. My gaze had been fixed on finding success and purpose in my job. It is so easy to fix our gaze on worldly things. I do it without even realizing it! But I don't want that to define me. I don't want to look for peace in my own purpose. Where or what is your gaze fixed on? I wonder how much we miss out on because of our selfish gaze. God's purpose is so much bigger and I certainly don't want to settle for anything less than his purpose and his perfect peace.
I came across a quote that I think words what our prayer should be perfectly: "May this be our prayer, 'I do not want to turn my eyes from you, O God. There I want them to stay and not move no matter what happens to me, within or without."
Where is your gaze? What changes need to be made so you can ensure your gaze is fixed on Jesus Christ? Don't wait, trust that fixing our eyes on Jesus, while harder, will lead us to our greater purpose!
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